Dear Dr. Aaron,
I dread getting groceries at our local “big box” store. I went Saturday morning hoping it wouldn’t be busy. My hopes were shattered as I pulled in to the already overflowing parking lot. My inner self said just go home, my belly said feed me! I made my way in to the store and began filling the cart from my list, being careful to mind my own business. The third item on my list was delicious DOT Pretzels. I searched and dodged five or six of the big carts with head phoned employee shoppers. Try as I might to not get agitated… I started feeling the frustration build. I spotted a very well-dressed lady a little older than me trying to retrieve DOT pretzels from the very top shelf. Always a gentleman, I offered to assist her. I pulled the last two bags from the top shelf and in the process, my shirt came up revealing only for a second my otherwise concealed firearm. I pulled the bags and she readily helped hold them while I fixed my shirt situation. I made small talk about the best pretzels ever and then realized I was talking to myself. She was gone!!! My DOT Pretzels gone! I was beyond agitated, things went downhill from there, the big can of peaches landed on my big toe, I am pretty sure it is out of place or broken and the case of water did my back in completely. I’m sure you can help my back, but can you help my pinky toe?
Thank you, Not so peachy pinky toe in Lake Ozark
P.S. The law enforcement officer waiting to talk to me about brandishing my weapon was very understanding, turns out he loves DOTS too!!
Things can get a little wonky when we take our little piggies to market! Sometimes grocery pickup is the greatest! They even load it for you! We will give you a full adjustment and see if we can right some of the wrongs from the box store. I appreciate the suggestion to try those pretzels, I hope they live up to the image you painted for me.
Always here for you, Dr. Aaron
P.S. We have great law enforcement at the lake!